Reviewing Isn't Singing Along with Toby Keith

I actually enjoy Talk About Me and it's great to sing along with - if I can keep up. 

The lyrics that stick with me are these:

"I like talking about you you you you, usually, but occasionally
I wanna talk about me (me,me,me,me- background singers)
I wanna talk about meeeeeeee (me,me- background singers)
(I wanna talk about me- background singers)mmmm me me me me
(I wanna talk about me- background singers)mmmm me me me me
You you you you you you you you you you you you you

I wanna talk about ME!"

What does Toby Keith's song have to do with reviewing? It is perfect to illustrate what readers should see in a review.   If I'm writing the review, you want to know what I felt, what I saw, how I was affected, what I liked, what I didn't, what I observed and what I looked for and what I found and what I didn't find.  Did I laugh, did I cry, did I faint from the scorching love scenes or fall asleep or did I want to rush out and tell everyone to read this book; all those things are points that make a review valuable to a potential buyer of a book.  What do they have in common? Me!  My opinion.

What I do not want to see is you: You will like this..., You will absolutely love..., You will cry when ..., You will want to ...., You will come to believe..., You must..., You are going to .... You you you you you.

Seriously, how can a reviewer possibly anticipate a reader reacting the same as the reviewer?

There are times when "You" can be fine to use.

"You might remember the old adage, "It takes a thief to catch a thief".

 At that point the reviewer is talking to the reader, drawing them in by using a common analogy or reference to make their point.   Nowhere in the above example is the reviewer telling the reader what they will do.  It's being chatty, and that's fine.  But when reviewers persist in talking...no telling the reader how to do this or that, then it ceases being a sharing of opinion and comes across as shaking a figurative finger at the reader with authority, "You will laugh...!" "You will do this...after reading this scene, chapter, book."

I don't think so.

To flip Mr. Keith's lyrics around from "I like talking about you you you you, usually, but occasionally
I wanna talk about me."

 It should be "I like talking about me me me me me, usually, but occasionally I can talk about you."

It's hard to refrain from You-ing all over the place.  A reviewer might do it because they feel that they're writing it in a way  that might relate better to the reader.  It's not. It's telling.  A review is your opinion and you are sharing about how the book, characters, dialogue, setting or sex scenes affected you.  Or not.

I need to see,  "I was amazed!"  not, "You will be amazed."  You can't possibly know that.

When I see a review telling me to do this or that,  I get all huffy and want to stomp up to my soap box  and hold up a neon sign that says STOP!  I don't like to see someone telling me how I'm going to react to the same book they're talking about. That's for me to decide.  I can only hope that I'll derive the same sense of enjoyment, awe, surprise or excitement out of the book as the reviewer.  But I can't be told to.

A reviewer's goal is to Make me want to experience those same things by hooking me, intriguing me, teasing me and painting with words that show me their enthusiasm and observations enough that it piques my interest, whets my appetite and encourages me to go and read the book for myself.  

Me.

Before you submit your review, look it over to see if you are sharing your opinion or telling.

Too much telling in a book can drag down the review rating.  Telling in a review is just as unwelcome.

Please be aware folks. And when writing, think in your head, 'talk about me'.

Me, Myself & I - Three's a Crowd

What in the world does the post title have with reviewing?

Let me digress for a moment. George Orwell in 1946 wrote an eloquent treatise on the English Language

** ii) Never us a long word where a short one will do.

(iii) If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.

(iv) Never use the passive where you can use the active.**

I've included a link for you to enjoy at your leisure. What is there to enjoy? I found it humorous that he calls the word ROMANTIC a meaningless word. Not that I agree. lol

But, why have I included this link to Mr. Orwell's writing? Because of example #(iii).
Again, I ask you, "What is a review?"

The answer I'm looking for is, "An opinion."

Right.

So, when a reviewer is writing their review, sharing their opinion, would it stand to reason that the phrase, "In my opinion" is redundant? Isn't the whole review your opinion? Think about that.

The following may seem trivial and for many reviewers it's not even on their radar. It ties into the previous point.

A reader knows, for example, that Xeranthemum is writing the review and I'm writing my opinion about the book so anything included are my thoughts, viewpoints, rationalities, justifications, feelings and observations.

Why then would I use "When I as a reader ..." or "I myself..." ? I'm already writing as me, wouldn't the reader know that?

Can someone explain to me why using those terms might be acceptable? Is there another way to express them that wouldn't be redundant? Any suggestions?

Shine On Me

I'm going to do a blatant self-promo only because two fantastic author's books are up for voting and since I wrote the reviews, I'm going to shout out about it. I've written much about writing reviews, now see me in action.

First let me post a teaser - Remember what I said about the first line sounding like a hook? Do you think I was successful?

Silver Zombie by Carole Nelson Douglas

What do the Wizard of Oz, zombies and really cool bar drinks have in common? The answer is the heroine of Silver Zombie, Delilah Street, paranormal investigator.

This is the fourth book in the series and Ms. Douglas keeps getting better and better. I think it helps to have read the previous books in the series just so a reader can understand one of the very intense and personally traumatic events that happens in this book. Ms. Street has had a severe phobia haunting her for fourteen years and it really impacts her love life. A reader finally finds out why she can’t remember a period of time in her life and it’s quite graphic. So, reader beware. I was outraged and horrified on the heroine’s behalf. I am so very glad her beau and lover was there to see her through it.

I keep finding new aspects of Ms. Street’s character that I like or am surprised by. I love her invisible internal, and sometimes I wonder if she’s truly imagined, sidekick, Irma. She reminds me of having Mae West as a conscience.

The interesting thing is that for most reviews, this length would be the total sum of the review. I'm not impressed. Want to see impressive? See the REST OF THE REVIEW

Then there is this other great book that is up for voting:
Dark Approach by Karen Wiesner

The Incognito series ends with a hard hitting, gritty yet cautiously optimistic bent that delivers exactly what readers have come to expect from the talented Ms. Wiesner.

I’ve often wondered how the author was going to pull off the final chapter and what astounding dark secret from the Id would she explore to a reader’s adventurous satisfaction. How could it be as diabolical as some of the exploits the Network has had to deal with in the past? What other dastardly thing had yet to be explored and conquered? I couldn’t wait to find out.

This final story in the Incognito Series, Dark Approach, deals with Victor and Lucy. Lucy ends up being more special than anyone ever expected and it is revealed early on during the course of this tale. Shannon McKee, the head of Oversight who usually sticks her head and hand into the situation with brutal manipulation, is missing from this tale but Angelo, second in command, more than makes up for it when he has to play the most important life and death chess game of his career. In fact, even though Angelo has had his own happily ever after in Dance in the Shadows, in my opinion, he is even more heroic in Dark Approach. The sacrifices he’s had to make over the long course of his time in the Network with an end game that might or might not come to fruition had to have been a severe and burdensome pressure on his heart and mind for that entire duration. In fact this book makes him all the more human because it gives readers an honest and open view of what demons drove Angelo, and it’s a whopper. Read the REST OF THE REVIEW HERE

I hope you've taken a gander at the two reviews in their entirety. Why? Because of what they say - not the words but by the lengths of the reviews. Readers who've seen reviews written by me before can tell when I completely, absolutely adore a book I've read, enough to give it a five book/cherry rating. I'm a bit long winded and find tons to share and talk about. It's not about knowing what to say, but where to stop.

So, please go vote and may the best review win!

OOH, Addedum! I found that there is another review of mine in the running on the Whipped Cream side of things!

Viking Seduction: Blood Hunter by Brannan Black

Excitement and surprises abound within the well written pages of Viking Seduction: Blood Hunter.
First off, this is a first person point of view story told from the male hero’s perspective and I thought it worked really well. In fact, it was vastly entertaining and it kept my interest completely throughout the entire tale.

Grady is a cop on the trail of his missing daughter. Right off the bat I was sympathetic to his character and I wanted him to succeed. What he has to do and what he finds out along the way had me flipping the pages at a furious pace. I liked his gruff, no nonsense manner and he doesn’t pull his punches. In fact, he’s a man’s man and a good officer and his skills come in to play in ways and places he never could have dreamed of.

One person he never thought he’d have a chance with is the blonde hottie he fantasized about. Segrun is a Viking warrior turned vampiress. She has some seriously major mojo and I enjoyed watching her love/hate relationship with Grady. REST OF THE REVIEW

NOW, please go vote. I can't wait to see the results of the voting come Monday. Woot!